The Fantastic Adventures of the Autie Team!

Part I: The amazing adventures of ASpieboy!


ASpieboy is invited out to a friend’s house for dinner. He is nervous, but his Mom advises him to try new things. She drops him off at his friend’s home and they play Legos for a while. Everything is going well, since his friend is ADD and quite content to talk in non-sequitors – or simply play in silence. ASpieboy relaxes and begins to enjoy himself and they are called to dinner. He knows his mother advised his friend’s mom on what was allowed on his GF/CF diet and he sits down knowing he will be able to eat most, if not all of what is put in front of him. But,


HORRORS!!!! When the plate is put in front of him, THE FOOD IS TOUCHING!!! The peas are rolling wildly into the corn!! The mashed potatoes are indistinguishable from the turnip!! And both are covering part of the meat!! Oh no!!!!!! How will he overcome this tragic turn of events and save the friendly atmosphere of dinner?

He first calms himself by tensing all his muscles and then relaxing them. He takes three deep breaths and recites in his mind, “I am ASpieboy, I shall overcome, I can do this, I can do this…”

Using his amazing powers of organization and ability to line up objects, he corrals the peas with his fork, driving them into the side of his plate. The corn now stands alone. Picking up his knife, he now scoops the mashed potatoes mess away from the meat. Realizing that the turnips and the potatoes are irrevocably intertwined, he takes another deep breath and mashes both together with his fork. This creates a homogenous mixture that cannot be identified or classified as either potato or turnip. Thus, muttering under his breath to congratulate himself on averting another catastrophe, he begins to eat.

Remembering to thank his friend and friend’s mom for a great dinner and fun visit, he is picked up by his Mom and whisked off to the safety and security of Home. Where the food never touches. He tells Mom of his narrow escape and she rewards him with lavish praise and computer time.

But he doesn’t do it for the rewards, or the praise. He does it because he can. He is triumphant. He is successful. He is ASpieboy.

(Cue theme music)